Monday, August 17, 2009

No words to describe it...

I’m having trouble finding the appropriate words to describe where I am in life right now. I’d throw out the words “bizarre, strange, or crazy”, but your first thought might be something negative. So, I will try these, “calm, joyous, relaxed.” These might not sound like anything exciting to you, but if you know me, or have read more than a few posts on my blog, then you understand that these particular words and I, have not had a meeting of the minds in quite awhile! If anything, I have been “fazzled, stressed and overwhelmed!” So, this is why I find it hard to explain the place I’m in – because I haven’t been here in quite awhile – and I haven’t felt this peaceful in many, many years.

All I know, is that everything I thought I had planned for myself – is no longer my plan. Sounds crazy.... but, all the thoughts I had about my life right now, what I’d be doing, when I’d have a baby, etc. have all changed. Don’t get me wrong, the dreams, desires and hopes around those particular things are still there, but the idea that it’s all about ME and MY timing has been crumbled. I’ve given EVERYTHING over to God and it has been so freeing!!!! I am so OKAY with whatever God has. Seriously. I had all these plans for myself and now, I have no idea what’s going to happen, or where I’m going to go, or when I might have a baby, and I have no problems with that.

I wish I could share more, but I am not at liberty to right now. (But, trust me – I can’t wait to blog about it when the timing is right). But – I know that the peace I have, and the things that God is starting to do, are amazing and can only be His doing. I’m so excited! I see God doing a work, and even though I don’t know much right now, I do know that that’s where I want to be. Right in the middle of His work!

"...clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ..." Rom. 13:14


3 comments:

Trischa said...

I love you, Girl! I'm excited for you and praying for you!

Mindy Rives said...

Hi there! Would love to chat with you. Email me if you want to get together soon....

mindyrives@gmail.com

Have a great day!!

Meggers1021 said...

Beautiful Shanen. That's so amazing that you can even take that first step of giving every single piece up to God. I'm so proud of you and truly respect your decision to be on God's time and not your own. We get so selfish and forget it's His plans not ours, and I am guilty of this for sure. I love you girl!